LET’S TALK ABOUT THERAPY
LGBTIQ+ Mental Health: Breaking Barriers and Finding Support
Mental health is something we all navigate, but for many in the LGBTIQ+ community, the journey can be particularly tough. While strong community connections and supportive relationships can act as protective factors, many LGBTIQ+ individuals experience stigma, discrimination, and exclusion, leading to higher rates of mental health difficulties.
Why Mental Health Struggles Are More Common in LGBTIQ+ Communities
Let’s be clear—being LGBTIQ+ is not the reason for higher rates of mental health struggles. The real issue lies in the discrimination and social exclusion many people experience. Facing rejection from family, being bullied at school, feeling unsafe in public spaces, or even dealing with everyday microaggressions can take a serious toll over time, negatively impacting social and emotional well-being.
According to the Australian Bureau of Statistics (ABS, 2024),LGBTIQ+ (referred to as LGB+) individuals are significantly more likely to experience mental health issues than heterosexual and cisgender individuals. Some key findings include:
• Three in four (74.5%) LGB+ individuals have experienced a mental disorder in their lifetime, compared to 41.7% of heterosexual individuals.
• Bisexual individuals (80.1%) and those who identify outside traditional labels (93.1%) report particularly high rates of mental health concerns.
• Nearly three in five (58.7%) LGB+ individuals have had a mental disorder in the past year, compared to 19.9% of heterosexual individuals.
• Non-binary people face even greater challenges, with 85.2% experiencing a mental disorder at some point—double the rate of men and women.
For transgender and gender-diverse individuals, the statistics are just as concerning. Young trans people (aged 16-34) are nearly twice as likely to experience a mental disordercompared to their cisgender peers.
The Importance of Seeking Mental Health Support
Despite these challenges, the good news is that many LGBTIQ+ individuals are actively seeking mental health support. The ABS (2024) data shows that:
• 46.8% of LGB+ individuals have seen a mental health professional in the past year, compared to 16% of heterosexual individuals.
• 70.4% of non-binary people have accessed mental health services, a rate more than three times higher than men and women.
• 28.7% of trans people have sought mental health support, compared to 17.2% of cis people.
This data shows that while mental health challenges are prevalent, many individuals are reaching out for help—and support is available.
Recognising International Transgender Day of Visibility 2025
March 31st marks International Transgender Day of Visibility (ITDV), an important day dedicated to celebrating transgender people, raising awareness of the discrimination they face, and advocating for more inclusive and affirming spaces.
ITDV 2025 is a reminder that visibility is about more than just recognition—it’s about creating real change. While visibility helps increase understanding and acceptance, many transgender individuals still face barriers to mental health support.
Gender-Affirming Therapy and Well-Being
Gender-affirming therapy plays a crucial role in supporting the mental health and well-being of trans and gender-diverse individuals.
Research shows that access to gender-affirming mental health support significantly reduces anxiety, depression, and suicide risk among members of the LGBTIQ+ communities.
Unlike traditional mental health approaches that may focus onthe over-medicalisation of non-binary identities, gender-affirming therapy validates and supports an individual’s gender identity rather than pathologising it.
This type of therapy can help individuals:
• Explore their gender identity in a safe and non-judgmental space.
• Develop coping strategies to navigate discrimination, dysphoria, and social challenges.
• Improve self-esteem and resilience by fostering self-acceptance and gender ‘euphoria’.
You’re Not Alone
Therapy can be a transformative tool for LGBTIQ+ individuals, providing a safe and affirming space to explore identity, process experiences, and build resilience.
Seeking therapy isn’t just about addressing challenges—it’s about unlocking personal growth, strengthening mental well-being, and affirming that every individual deserves support, respect, and the freedom to live as their true selves.
Written by Charlie Haddad (Social Worker)
Overcoming Shame: A Neuroscientific Understanding
Shame is a profound and complex emotion that can deeply affect mental health and well-being. It often stems from a fear of exposure—of having our flaws or perceived inadequacies seen by others. When left unaddressed, shame can lead to anxiety, depression, and self-isolation. However, recent neuroscientific research provides valuable insights into how we can navigate and heal from shame.
The Nature of Shame: Differentiating Shame from Guilt
Shame and guilt are often confused, but they differ in a crucial way:
Guilt is feeling bad about what you did and is tied to specific actions (“I did something wrong”).
Shame is feeling bad about yourself as a person and is linked to identity (“I am wrong”).
This distinction is important because while guilt can motivate us to make amends, shame often leads to feelings of worthlessness and a deep fear of judgment. Over time, unresolved shame can become embedded in our self-concept, shaping how we view ourselves and interact with others.
The Neuroscience of Shame
Shame is not just an emotional experience—it has a direct impact on brain function, activating key regions that shape how we process difficult emotions:
Amygdala: The Emotional Alarm System
The amygdala is responsible for detecting threats and triggering emotional responses. When we experience shame, the amygdala, our brain’s emotional alarm system, is activated. This sets off a fight-or-flight response, leading to feelings of fear, panic, self-judgment, and self-protective behaviours like withdrawal or aggression. If shame remains unprocessed, it can become deeply ingrained, influencing our behaviours, relationships, and overall self-worth.
Prefrontal Cortex: The Rational Regulator
The prefrontal cortex is the part of the brain involved in logic, self-regulation, and decision-making. Research suggests that when we name our emotions, brain activity shifts from the amygdala to the prefrontal cortex, allowing for more rational thinking and self-awareness. This shift helps us regain a sense of control, reducing the intensity of shame and enabling us to respond with self-compassion rather than self-criticism.
The Healing Power of Acknowledging Shame
Understanding the brain’s response to shame helps explain why naming our emotions—acknowledging them rather than avoiding them—can be a powerful tool for healing. When we bring shame into conscious awareness, we engage the rational parts of the brain, weakening its emotional grip and making space for self-acceptance.
By recognising shame’s impact on the brain and learning how to navigate it with self-awareness, we can take meaningful steps toward emotional resilience and healing.
Understanding Co-Regulation: A Key to Emotional Well-Being
In today’s fast-paced world, managing emotions can feel overwhelming, especially for those who struggle with emotional regulation. Whether it’s children, neurodivergent individuals, or people navigating mental health challenges, emotional ups and downs can have a profound impact on daily life. One of the most effective ways to support someone’s emotional well-being is through co-regulation—the process of offering external support to help them manage their emotions.
What is Co-Regulation?
Co-regulation is all about connection. It happens when a calm, supportive person helps someone else regulate their emotions. Think of it like being an anchor in a storm—offering reassurance, patience, and emotional stability when someone feels overwhelmed. Unlike self-regulation, where an individual manages emotions on their own, co-regulation relies on positive interactions to create emotional balance and resilience. Research in developmental psychology highlights that consistent co-regulation leads to better emotional outcomes in both children and adults (Porges, 2011; Siegel, 2012).
Why is Co-Regulation Important?
Co-regulation plays a vital role in emotional development and mental well-being. It is particularly beneficial for:
Children – Kids aren’t born knowing how to handle big emotions. They need caregivers to guide them, providing comfort and teaching them how to self-soothe.
Neurodivergent Individuals – Those with autism, ADHD, or intellectual disabilities often experience emotions more intensely. Co-regulation helps them develop coping skills and feel more in control.
Individuals with Trauma or Anxiety – People with past trauma or anxiety may struggle with self-regulation. Having a supportive presence can help them feel safe and build confidence in managing their emotions.
How Does Co-Regulation Work?
Effective co-regulation includes three key elements:
Staying Calm – When emotions run high, a calm and steady presence can make all the difference. If you remain composed, it helps the other person feel more secure.
Being Supportive – Acknowledging emotions without judgment, offering validation, and using a soothing tone can help the distressed individual feel understood and safe.
Encouraging Self-Regulation – Over time, co-regulation fosters self-regulation skills by modelling coping strategies such as deep breathing, mindfulness, and problem-solving.
The Role of Therapists in Co-Regulation
Therapists play a crucial role in helping individuals develop emotional regulation skills through co-regulation. In therapy sessions, professionals create a safe and supportive environment where clients can express their emotions without fear of judgment. By modelling calm and empathetic responses, therapists help individuals feel understood and valued.
Therapists also teach practical techniques for emotional regulation, such as mindfulness, grounding exercises, and cognitive-behavioural strategies. Over time, these approaches empower individuals to build their own self-regulation skills. Whether working with children, neurodivergent individuals, or those processing trauma, therapists act as steady guides, helping clients navigate their emotions in a constructive and healthy way.
Final Thoughts
Co-regulation is a powerful tool that fosters emotional stability and resilience. By staying calm, offering support, and modelling healthy coping skills, we can help others navigate their emotions more effectively. Whether you’re a parent, caregiver, therapist, or a supportive friend, practicing co-regulation can have a lasting impact on someone’s well-being. When we show up with patience and understanding, we create a foundation for stronger emotional health—not just for others, but for ourselves as well.
Written by Charlie Haddad, Registered Social Worker
How Trauma Affects the Brain — and How Therapy Can Help
Our brains are constantly working behind the scenes—processing sensory experiences, assessing potential threats, and storing memories. When everything is functioning well, these systems work together to help us feel safe, regulate emotions, and make sense of our experiences.
But when trauma enters the picture, it can disrupt this delicate balance. Suddenly, everyday life can feel overwhelming, emotions can become unpredictable, and the past can feel eerily present. If you’ve ever wondered why trauma has such a profound impact on the brain, let’s break it down in a simple way by looking at three key players in the brain’s response system:
The Amygdala: Your Overactive Alarm System
The Hippocampus: The Librarian That Struggles to File Memories
The Prefrontal Cortex: The Wise Leader Who Gets Overwhelmed
Understanding how these parts of the brain function—and how they change in response to trauma—can help us make sense of emotional reactions, triggers, and stress. More importantly, it highlights why therapy can be so effective in helping the brain heal.
The Amygdala: Your Overactive Alarm System
Think of the amygdala as the brain’s alarm system, always scanning for danger. Its job is to detect threats and, if necessary, sound the alarm by releasing stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol. This helps prepare the body for survival—whether that means fighting, fleeing, freezing, or fawning (pleasing to avoid conflict).
But when someone experiences trauma, the amygdala can become hypersensitive—like a smoke detector that goes off at the slightest hint of toast burning. Even in safe environments, trauma survivors might feel constantly on edge, experiencing intense emotional reactions to things that remind them of past dangers. A loud noise, a certain smell, or a particular place can all trigger the alarm, even when there’s no actual threat.
The Hippocampus: The Librarian Struggling to File Memories
If the amygdala is the alarm system, the hippocampus is like the brain’s librarian. Its job is to organise and store memories properly, ensuring we can tell the difference between past and present events.
In a well-functioning brain, when the amygdala sounds the alarm, the hippocampus checks the archives. It looks for past experiences and determines whether the current situation is actually dangerous. If it finds that the alarm is unnecessary, it tells the amygdala to calm down.
However, trauma can impair the hippocampus, making it harder for it to do its job. Instead of neatly filing a traumatic memory away as something that happened in the past, the hippocampus leaves the memory scattered and disorganised. This is why people who have experienced trauma may struggle with:
Flashbacks or intrusive thoughts – The brain misfiles traumatic events, making them feel as if they are happening right now.
Fragmented memories – Some parts of the trauma are vivid, while other details seem lost or out of order.
Triggers that evoke strong emotions – A smell, sound, or sensation can bring back the emotions of the trauma as if it’s happening again.
The Prefrontal Cortex: The Wise Leader Who Gets Overwhelmed
The prefrontal cortex is the rational, decision-making part of the brain—the wise leader that helps us regulate emotions, think logically, and put things into perspective. When it’s functioning well, it keeps the amygdala in check and helps the hippocampus organise memories properly.
But during a traumatic event, the prefrontal cortex often goes offline. The brain’s priority in a crisis is survival, so rational thought takes a backseat. This is why, in the middle of extreme stress, it can feel impossible to think clearly, control emotions, or make logical decisions.
Over time, if trauma remains unresolved, the prefrontal cortex struggles to regain control. This can make it harder to manage emotions, respond calmly to stress, and feel in control of one’s thoughts and behaviours.
The Good News: The Brain Can Heal
Trauma may reshape the brain, but it doesn’t have to stay that way. Thanks to neuroplasticity, the brain’s ability to rewire and adapt, healing is possible. With the right therapeutic support, these brain systems can be retrained to function in a healthier, more balanced way. Therapy plays a crucial role in:
Calming the Amygdala (Alarm System) – Mindfulness, breathing exercises, and grounding techniques can help turn down the volume on the alarm, reducing hypervigilance and anxiety.
Helping the Hippocampus (Librarian) – Trauma-focused therapies, journaling, and guided memory processing can help properly file past experiences where they belong: in the past.
Strengthening the Prefrontal Cortex (Wise Leader) – Cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT) and other trauma-informed approaches can help restore rational thinking, emotional regulation, and a sense of control.
Moving Forward
If trauma has left your brain’s alarm system, librarian, and wise leader out of sync, know that healing is possible. Therapy provides the tools to help your brain restore balance, regain control, and, most importantly, feel safe again. Understanding how your brain responds to trauma is the first step toward reclaiming your well-being and moving toward post-traumatic growth.
If you’re ready to start this journey, reaching out to a trauma-informed therapist can be a powerful step forward. Your brain has been doing its best to protect you—now it’s time to help it heal.’
Written by Charlie Haddad, Registered Social Worker
What is mindfulness?
You’ve probably heard of mindfulness before, but what exactly is it?
Mindfulness can be defined as intentional present moment awareness, without judgement. It is the process of attending to our immediate experience – whether that is our thoughts, our emotions, our bodily sensations, or other sensory experiences (sound, sight, smell, touch and taste).
This practice has been shown to reduce stress levels, rumination and emotional reactivity while increasing our ability to think flexibly and focus. Because of its broad benefits, mindfulness is a common element in many therapies
There are many ways you can begin the incorporate mindfulness practice into your life. Here are some suggestions to start:
Mindful breathing
You can do this for as long or as little as you like. I recommend starting with a minute and just noticing how this practice feels for you. Sit or lie down in a comfortable place, and when you feel ready, bring your attention to your breath. You don’t have to change it in any way, just focus your attention on the feeling of it. You may choose to focus on the feeling of air filling and emptying from your lungs, the rise and fall of your chest, or the sensation of air passing through your nostrils or mouth. Whatever feels comfortable for you is ok. You might notice your attention wandering during the exercise, following a thought or a sound – this is completely normal, practice noticing when this is occurring and gently redirecting your focus to your breath.
Mindful cup-of-tea
Brew a mug of your favourite tea and sit down somewhere quiet. Here the focus is on mindfully attending to the senses. First you may start with sight – noticing the steam rising from your hot tea, the colour of the tea, the colour of your mug. You might like to explore the sense of touch; you can hover your hand at the edge of your mug and notice how close it must come to feel a sense of heat, how does this sense of temperature change as you move your hand back and forth? If you bring your hand to the surface of your mug, how does it feel under your fingers? Notice the temperature, texture, and firmness of this surface. You can explore smell by taking a deep inhale and noticing the aroma of your tea. And finally, explore mindfully attending to the taste of your tea. You may like to begin with a small sip, holding it in your mouth for a while to really notice how the tea tastes. As you swallow, see if you can follow the sensations of tea’s journey all the way down your throat into the stomach.
Yoga
Yoga incorporates mindfulness throughout its practice and can be a beautiful way to begin practicing mindful awareness. Explore this by taking an in person or online class to allow your instructor to fully guide you through the process.
If you’re interested in mindfulness, you may want to explore this with a mental health professional. We have a number of clinicians who are skilled in educating clients in mindful living. Meet our team, or contact the practice to discuss available support options.
What are psycho-sexual issues...and how can therapy help?
Whilst sex and intimacy can be a significant part of many people’s lives, seeking therapy for concerns or questions related to psychosexual issues that affect us or our relationships often slip our minds. We grow up in communities that often see talking about our experiences with sex as taboo or awkward, so it’s understandable to feel shy or uncomfortable when wanting to bring this up with your therapist but as therapists, we understand that wanting to create enjoyable sexual experiences are a normal healthy part of being human.
Psychosexual conditions are sexual issues or conditions that are psychological in origin rather than just physiological. Mental health conditions such as anxiety, depression, chronic stress and trauma can contribute to this. How severe or intense these issues may present themselves can vary and some are temporary or minor, whilst types of psychosexual issues are more ongoing or long-term.
Some examples of psychosexual issues include:
Sexual pain (ie. vaginismus or vulvodynia) or painful intercourse
Difficulty orgasming
Erectile Dysfunction
Mismatched libidos within couples
Lack of sexual desire
However, it’s important to note that coming to therapy to navigate psychosexual-related topics can also include:
Exploring kink and fetishes
Non-monogamy and polyamory
Gender and sexuality
Body Image and Self-Esteem
Coping with an STI or STD diagnosis
Negotiating Boundaries and Learning to practice consent
How can therapy help with psychosexual concerns?
Coming to therapy to talk about psychosexual issues can help you navigate these experiences with someone who aims to create a warm and non-judgemental space. If questions or statements like “I want a more intimate relationship”, “I find it difficult to feel turned on but my partner gets turned on so quickly”, or “Sex is painful and difficult, how can I change this?”, and “I think my illness or medication is affecting my sex life” resonate with you; speaking to a practitioner that can help you unpack/explain these issues, can be beneficial. Making sense of the unknown can create a healthy sense of control in our lives, which can allow for adaptive interpersonal relationships.
Everyone has the right to want to pursue and experience a safe, sex-positive and pleasurable sex life. We have a number of mental health practitioners who could support you in unpacking concerns and uncertainties within your interpersonal space. Contact our practice to learn more about supports available to you.
ADHD in adulthood
What is ADHD?
Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is a neurodevelopmental disorder that impacts areas of executive functioning such as attention, working memory, emotion regulation, impulse control, planning, organisation and task initiation Thanks to greater education and awareness of ADHD in recent years, more people are now being diagnosed in adulthood.
How can ADHD impact an individual?
ADHD can also impact adults in areas such as self-esteem, close relationships and work. Individuals who are diagnosed with ADHD in adulthood can suffer from low self-esteem due to internalising negative messaging from others such as parents, teachers and employers. For example, people who are diagnosed with ADHD in adulthood often report being told at school that they could do well if they better applied themselves or were less disruptive in class, while at home they may experience the frustration of parents and other family members due to forgetfulness or difficulty initiating tasks. These difficulties often continue into university and the workplace. Receiving a diagnosis of ADHD can assist many individuals in having a better understanding of their behaviour and how to best manage it.
Treatment for ADHD
Medication is considered to be the first-line treatment for ADHD in adulthood, assisting with symptom reduction and improved outcomes on cognitive function. However, research also suggests that other factors can be helpful when used in conjunction to pharmacological treatment such as psychoeducation, cognitive-behavioural interventions and aerobic physical exercise (in particular, those that target executive function such as martial arts and ball-based sports). Psychotherapy can also be a helpful intervention to assist with secondary issues such as self-esteem, emotion-regulation and relationship difficulties.
If you believe you may have ADHD, it may be helpful to speak to a health professional such as your General Practitioner in order to arrange an appropriate referral for an assessment. Various psychologists at DKM Psychology can help with facilitating an assessment for ADHD. To find out more, visit drkimm.com/assessments
Written by Holly Monaghan (Psychologist)
Have you heard of Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EMDR)?
EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing, is a psychological focused strategy which has been thoroughly researched to treat mental health disorder and trauma. It was created by Francine Shapiro, American psychologist after she discovered how eye movement helped her to reduce a distressful thought.
EMDR works with both side of the brain to help client to integrate and reprocess a traumatic incident to bring it to a fruitful resolution for their traumatic memory. The brain has the natural capacity to resolve our daily life stressful event, however, with traumatic event, our brain needs a bit more support. EMDR helps to desensitise fight and flight trauma responses which are immediate, automatic and instinctive response to fear. EMDR also is very effective to work with our psychological defence when it comes to unpleasant and hidden vulnerable feelings. They are the important parts that needs to be targeted in treatment because they drive our unhelpful behaviours and thoughts about ourself, other, relationship and the world.
Before doing EMDR, client needs to be assessed properly to see if EMDR is a suitable treatment for them. Desensitising and reprocessing phrase can’t be performed until client achieve some level of safety and emotional stability in their life.
EMDR is based on AIP ( adaptive information processing) which means our current triggers and presenting issues are the result of what happened in the past. For example, someone who was bullied in their primary school, can have anxiety and confident issues when they come to work and find it hard to fit in with other co-workers. EMDR target the traumatic memories of them being bullied to change their unhelpful core belief about themselves – which then can change their behaviours from protective of themselves to more connecting with others co-workers in working environment.
I have completed Level 2 training in EMDR and will continue to advance my skills in this treatment style. At DKM Psychology I use EMDR in my work with clients who have experienced significant traumatic events. I currently have capacity to accept new client referrals for 2023, with immediate availability. I accept GP, Workcover, TAC and Private referrals.
Written by Thanh Nguyen (AMHSW)
What is an Accredited Mental Health Social Worker?
Accredited Mental Health Social Workers (AMHSWs) are recognised professionals and Medicare providers. They deliver clinical mental health social work services in different settings and use a various range of evidence-based practice.
AMHSWs engage with different types of people across the lifespan and from different background and culture. They work in a client centered manner and a holistic approach considering client’s biopsychosocial factors. That is, their biology, psychology, and social influences.
AMHSWs are expected to be highly skilled and to attend advanced mental health trainings and supervision regularly to prepare them to work with clients who have complex mental health presentation and different co-morbidities. AMHWS are assessed by AASW which is recognised by Federal Government as an assessing body of specialist mental health expertise. Therefore, they meet some of the highest standards of professional regulation in Australia.
Some of the evidence-based approach they use in their practice include Cognitive Behaviour Therapy, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) and Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EMDR) to maximise the outcome for client’s mental health recovery. AMHSWs are important members who contribute a vast positive impact to mental health system in Australia.
At DKM Psychology I work with a variety of clients who have experienced significant traumatic events, are dealing with compulsive behaviours, or navigating through various life stressors. I currently have capacity to accept new client referrals for 2023, with immediate availability. I accept GP, Workcover, TAC and Private referrals.
Written by Thanh Nguyen (AMHSW)
Mental Health of Children
Most children throughout their early development experience positive mental health if they are living within an environment that is responsive to their needs and stimulates their development. Positive mental health allows children to cope effectively with challenges they encounter, express and regulate their emotions, develop and maintain positive and secure relationships and feel confident in exploring their environments at a developmentally appropriate level.
Mental health of children, much like that of adults, is not fixed. It occurs along a continuum and can range from positive mental health, to vulnerabilities or difficulties, and diagnosable mental health concerns. A child’s “position” on the continuum is influenced by a range of factors:
Their inner world
Their relationships and social world
Their family circumstances
Positive mental health
Most children will experience positive mental health. They are able to effectively meet challenges, express and regulate their emotions, confidently explore their environment, and form secure relationships within a developmentally and age-appropriate context. It is important to remember there is not “one size fits all” description of what positive mental health looks like for a child. A child must be considered within the context of their circumstances.
Vulnerabilities or difficulties
Vulnerabilities or difficulties in young children may present as frequent difficulties with their emotions, thoughts, behaviours, learning, or relationships. Children experiencing mental health vulnerability or difficulties may have:
Trouble calming down after a strong emotion or may struggle to regulate their emotions and behaviour.
Challenges separating from their parent
Sleep, eating, or engagement (e.g., at school or within the community) concerns
Diagnosed mental health condition
Mental health conditions are influenced by a combination of factors, including internal and external stressors (including poor coping strategies), a child’s temperament, and changes in relationships (friendships, family, school, etc.). A mental health condition may present as significant changes in a child’s typical behaviours and can be distinguished from a vulnerability by the intensity, duration, and the extent of impact on the child.
Written by Emma Trott (Registered Psychologist)
The Importance of Sleeping Well
Getting enough sleep is one of the most important things you can do for your physical and mental health and overall wellbeing.
The impact of poor sleep:
Direct negative impact on mental health and long-term inadequate sleep increases the risk of developing depression, anxiety, and burnout
Poor concentration
Negative impact on emotional and social processing abilities
The benefits of sleep:
Memories are consolidated, and neural connections are strengthened
Improved mental health and general wellbeing
Improved attention and concentration
Increased energy levels
Improved physical health and immune system
Improved brain functioning including clearer thinking, improved decision-making capacity, increased productivity, and performance
Tips to help you sleep better:
Exercise throughout the day
Avoid daytime naps
Reduce screen time in the evening and no screen time 30 minutes before bed
Have a consistent sleep schedule, include bed and wake time
Avoid wakeful-inducing foods before bed including caffeinated foods and drinks, alcohol, fast food and processed foods
Develop and stick to a relaxing bedtime routine
Written by Emma Trott (Registered Psychologist)
Managing Anger in Children
Anger is a natural human emotion. Like other emotions, such as stress, there are helpful and unhelpful sides of anger.
Anger can be a helpful emotion as it can provide you with energy to get something done or stand up for what you believe in. However, anger can also be an unhelpful emotion, especially if it happens frequently or gets out of control. Often when we are angry, we lose our temper which can lead to problems worsening or increased conflict.
When we are feeling angry, it’s important to manage our anger in positive and healthy ways. Managing anger can be challenging, especially early on. Here are some tips to assist yourself and your little ones manage your anger.
Recognise early warning signs of anger
Our body is an amazing resource and will often tell us we’re feeling angry (or beginning to), before we are even able to identify the emotion ourselves. Recognising the ways our body is telling us we’re angry can assist us in managing anger in the early anger stages. Early signs of anger may include:
Change in heart rate
Upset stomach
Precursor emotions to anger such as cranky, annoyed, or irritated
Change in breathing
Change in body temperature – often feeling warm or flushed
Tight muscles
Sweating
Negative thinking – “I have to do everything myself!” “Why is no one listening to me!”
Practice an anger relaxation strategy
Similar to other emotions, such as worry or sadness, when we’re feeling angry there are many things we can do to return our emotions back to a sense of calm. Relaxation strategies will vary according to each individual – something that may work for someone may be ineffective for another. It’s best to have a multitude of strategies in the event one doesn’t work or can’t be performed due to a different environment. Here are some examples of relaxation strategies:
Controlled breathing
Engaging in physical activity, such as a walk or run
Talking to someone about how you are feeling
Engaging in a fun, calming activity such as drawing, reading, or watching a favourite TV show
Model, model, model!
Children learn through observation. Seeing you model how to notice your own anger, acknowledge you anger, and implement a relaxation strategy to assist with calming your emotions is a great way to model and teach your children how to manage their own anger. This also allows you to normalise the feeling of anger for your child.
Written by Emma Trott (Registered Psychologist)
Managing Back to School Worries in Children
The return to school can be understandably tricky to navigate for some children, let alone during a time of increased uncertainty due to the COVID-19 pandemic. Whilst returning to school for some may seem an easy feat, for others, it may come with increased worry and may result in increased difficulty with managing your child’s emotions. However, there are strategies that can be helpful for managing back to school worry in children:
Talking and preparing your child for the return to school:
Talking to your child and preparing them for what the return to school may look like is a useful strategy for managing their back-to-school worries. Talking about the expectations of a school environment including the daily classroom structure, their new teacher and classmates, as well as any changes relevant to the pandemic (e.g., mask wearing of staff and some students, regular hand washing and sanitising, possible rules about playing in the yard) can be helpful to provide children with a realistic and clear understanding of what the return to school may look like.
Provide opportunities for your child to ask questions:
Children are often full of questions – they need to know the answer to everything! Providing time for your child to openly discuss their worries and ask questions about the return to school is a great way to allow them to directly discuss their specific worries. This will also allow you to understand how they are feeling and collaboratively discuss problem solving strategies or techniques about how to manage their worries.
Introducing relaxation strategies:
Relaxation strategies can be helpful when experiencing all emotions. Engaging in relaxation strategies are helpful in relaxing our bodies and mind and instilling a sense of calmness. Breathing exercises are a great introductory relaxation strategy for children as there are different techniques can be easily adapted to suit individual children.
Belly breathing: Have your child lay down on their back and place a favourite toy on their belly. Prompt them to breathe in through their nose and watch as their belly and toy rises. Then breathe out through their mouth slowly and watch as their toy and belly go back down.
Pizza breathing: Prompt your child to breathe in through their nose as if they’re smelling their favourite pizza (or another favourite food of their preference). As they exhale through their mouth, imagine they are cooling down the pizza with their breath.
Bubble breathing: This is a great breathing technique for children who enjoy multi-sensory learning. Using bubbles, prompt children to take a slow inhale through their nose before exhaling and blowing bubbles.
Written by Emma Trott (Registered Psychologist)
What happens in therapy?
So you're curious about getting therapy? Or maybe you've taken the leap and already booked in your first session! But what even happens in therapy?
The therapy room can be a mysterious place for those who haven't been before. There's lots of inaccurate representations on TV and all that confidentiality around sessions (necessary for your privacy and comfort) also means it can be hard to know what to expect when you walk into the room.
While every therapist will have different styles and processes, here are some things you can expect to experience no matter who you're seeing
The goal of the first 1-3 sessions is usually for your therapist to develop their understanding of what's going on for you currently, who you are, and some of your history. You will speak about what’s brought you to therapy. You might also talk about things like your relationships, family, mental and physical health history, work/school and what your therapeutic goals are. This is also a time to get to know your therapist, get a feel for their style and work out if they are a good fit for you.
Following sessions will focus more actively on your goals and vary depending on what you're working on, they may include things like:
understanding what you’re experiencing and what’s contributing to this
learning new skills and ways of thinking
challenging unhelpful beliefs
planning how to change certain behaviours
participating in imagery exercises or behavioural experiments
amongst many more options!
Some sessions may involve lots of talking and reflecting, some sessions may involve experiential exercises or activities. Different things work for different people and discussing how your sessions are run with your therapist is important. Hate worksheets? Tell your therapist. Don't understand why your therapist focussing on something? Ask them! Feel like your therapist's approach isn't working? Tell them!
Therapy is a collaborative and individualised process; your preferences matter, you don't have to do/talk about things you aren't comfortable with, and your therapist will work with you to find a process that works for YOU.
Written by Madeleine Holland (Registered Psychologist)
Children can see psychologists too?
It’s likely that when you think of the term “psychologist” you envision someone who works with adults and discusses complex life challenges. But did you know psychologists also work with children?
Child psychology or the provision of psychological services to children involves the treatment of a wide range of concerns and disorders that affect children. Children are often referred to psychologists when presenting with or there are concerns regarding their development, emotional, social, and behavioural functioning, or academic progression. Concerns may include:
Cognitive and emotional functioning and development
Academic challenges such as difficulty with reading, writing, maths, classroom attention and concentration
Challenging behaviours and behaviours of concern
Emotional and mental health difficulties and concerns including general psychological wellbeing, anxiety, and emotional regulation
Friendship and social difficulties
Self-esteem
Periods of transition including transition to primary or secondary school, parental or family changes, moving school, and school readiness
Child psychology can involve the administration of individual therapy, much like that of an adult but utilising child-friendly approaches. These may involve hands on and sensory activity integration within the therapeutic space, utilising games, colourful visuals and engaging worksheets, picture story books, play, drawing, colouring, and talking.
Psychometric assessment can also be involved, which can assist in further investigating areas of concerns (e.g., cognitive, academic or developmental concerns). Assessment may be warranted when a child is presenting with concerns related to:
Cognitive concerns
Learning and academic concerns
Social, emotional, and behavioural concerns including with attention and concentration, social and friendship difficulties, and challenging behaviours or behaviours of concern
Assessment can be helpful to provide detailed information regarding the child’s strengths and areas of difficulties, assist in diagnosis (if applicable), and provide guidance around specific and targeted interventions.
Whilst the psychologist spends the large proportion of the session with the child, they actively involve and engage those involved within the child’s life (including yourself as a parent, and also teachers and other relevant professionals).
Written by Emma Trott (Registered Psychologist)
New Year, New … choices
The New Year has well and truely arrived, with the chaos of the festive season behind us all. For many the new year symbolises a fresh start, a point in time where the errors of the past 12 months no longer matter or can be forgotten about, and the quest for self improvement and/or transformation commences. Social media becomes inundated by the hashtag #NewYearNewMe (1.3million hashtags on Instagram for anyone who was interested), comparison collages of weight loss achievements and gym gains, and inspirational quotes announcing how this year will be like no other. Apologies in advance, but I call bullshit.
Where did the idea that change in behaviour meant change in the person? I further question, why would we want to change the person? Physical transformations, achievement of savings goals, mastering new skills, modifying work-life balance, are indicative of hard work, dedication, and commitment to changing CHOICES, not the person. Loosing weight (probably one of the most common New Years resolutions) is not achieved because the person has changed who they are. It is achieved because that same person has made the choice to increase their physical activity and modify the types and amounts of foods they consume. The person who saves their house deposit has chosen to painstakingly set aside money rather than spend it on burgers and beers with friends every Friday night. The person who achieves a more balanced distribution of work and personal commitments, has chosen to say “no” to taking on extra responsibilities so they can come home to their family, friends, and/or pets in time to talk rubbish over dinner or watch mind-numbing TV series together.
I do not intend to suggest that making these new choices is easy. It is definitely not easy to change habits and behaviours that serve us a purpose, even if the outcomes are maladaptive. There is comfort in chaos. Therapy can help better understand why you may feel there is a need to change you as a person, as well as the obstacles in between this moment and your desired achievements (I had to throw in one therapy plug).
What I am attempting to convey is that changing the person should not be the intention or the explanation for why goals are achieved. It is the choices, commitment, dedication, and hard work that the person has made and continues to endure. Also, with choice comes control, and in the end I feel that is something we all want in our lives. Take ownership, make change but be you because being you should be great. #NewYearNewChoices
Getting help over the holidays.
The end of the year can be a difficult time for many people. This time often signifies family, togetherness, gluttony, and spending. Each of those in isolation can be anxiety provoking, let alone all combined and constantly advertised via every media outlet possible; therefore perpetuating the pressure to meet unrealistic standards of how to celebrate over the holiday season.
There is no right way to celebrate the holiday period. The best way, is your way; and if your way is to kick back on the couch with people whose company you actually enjoy, then do that! I know that is much easier said than done, so for those who are looking down the path of Christmas pleasantries, triggering family interactions, and financial pressures, consider utilising supports during this time.
For those who may not have access to their/a therapist, or usual supports are also out fulfilling their holiday duties during this time, telephone and online services can provide you with some reprieve. Some people are reluctant to access these modes of support as they can be perceived as impersonal, but I encourage at least some consideration; at the bare minimum they provide an outlet for venting and opportunity for validation.
The list below includes some easily accessible support services. Some offer both online and telephone support, as well as other supportive resources through their websites. I suggest to check them out, have a look through what they offer, so when the need for support arises you already know what options are available to you. Better yet, if there is anticipatory anxiety for what is ahead, why not access the services as a means to minimise the impact.
Lifeline 13 11 14
Beyond Blue 1300 224 636
Kids Helpline 1800 551 80
Mensline 1300 78 99 78
Griefline 1300 845 745
Directline (Drug and Alcohol counselling, also for family) 1800 888 236
Suicideline 1300 651 251
Emergency services for medical emergencies 000
The key takeaway is to savor the holiday period in a manner that feels right for you and to leverage the available support services. Whether it's a quiet day on the couch or a gathering with loved ones, remember that your well-being takes precedence, and seeking assistance when needed is a sign of strength, not weakness. Wishing you a mindful and supported holiday season in 2023.
Does going to therapy mean I’m crazy?
There is a common misconception that seeing therapist means you are crazy, unstable, weird, or maybe even broken. However, any of those adjectives could not be any more further from the truth.
Therapy is useful for different reasons for different people; but one thing that every client has in common, is that they are seeking help. Assistance from a therapist may be required to:
Work through a specific current day issue
Find better ways of coping
Better understand unhealthy patterns/symptoms/distress
Validation and support, or
Help with healthy decision making
Although this may seem like a short list, there is nothing in that list that suggests ‘craziness’ is a reason. Sometimes distressing emotions can feel like loosing control and that can then lead to questioning of experience, capacity, and general sound-mindedness. However, there is no clinical definition of crazy (that I know of at least!).
I recently attended a two a two day seminar where the distinguished presenter put it quite eloquently: “we are all bozos travelling on the same bus”. So whatever your reason, there is nothing crazy about wanting or needing to speak to a therapist.
Not all therapists are one in the same; the difference between professions.
As a psychologist, the question about the difference between psychologists, psychiatrists, and counsellors is one I receive multiple times throughout the year from all different clients. Although the three professions can label themselves as therapists, they are all different in many ways; with variability even within each profession. However, in an attempt to keep things simple these are the main reasons (see below for elaboration):
Education
Registration
Supervised Practice
Medication, and
Function
EDUCATION
Psychiatrists and Psychologists must have completed university qualifications.
Psychiatrists have medical degrees (they’re legit doctors) who then complete specialist training in psychiatry.
Psychologists have (at minimum) a Bachelors Degree in Psychology, a fourth year qualification (Honours or Graduate Diploma), and a Masters Degree. Some psychologists will have Dr in their title, which means they have completed a Doctoral program (Clinical Doctorate or a PhD). All of that study equates to at least five years of university, but can be up to 10 if the psychologist has completed a Clinical Doctorate or PhD.
Counsellors do not need to achieve a minimum level of training to practice with that title.
REGISTRATION
Psychiatrists and Psychologists must be registered with the Australian Health Practitioners Regulation Agency (AHPRA) in order to be recognised to practice within Australia. AHPRA oversee and protect the registration of all health professionals in the country. Psychiatrists and Psychologists can be searched via AHPRA’s register of practitioners.
Counsellors can be registered with Psychotherapy and Counselling Federation of Australia (PACFA) but this is not mandatory.
INTERNSHIP AND SUPERVISED PRACTICE
Unlike Counsellors, Psychiatrists and Psychologists must complete a supervised internship (under supervision of various Senior Psychologists) at some point in their university training. Psychologists are also expected to complete 30 hours of continuing professional development each year in order to remain registered.
MEDICATION
Psychiatrists are the only profession who can prescribe pharmacological treatment (medications) as they are the only profession of the three that has a medical background.
PURPOSE/FUNCTION
Psychiatrists are usually engaged with clients who require pharmacological intervention as part of their treatment plan. This could include (but not limited to) psychiatric conditions such as: Bipolar, Schizophrenia, Personality Disorders, and other Chronic conditions that significantly impact the fulfillment of basic functions in an individual’s life. It would be recommended that a psychiatrist is involved in your care if your psychiatric condition has an organic (physical) cause, or “talking therapy” does not seem to be working.
Psychologists are trained in “talking therapies”, and there is great variability within the field itself. Different psychologists specialise in different styles depending on their training and interests. It is important to ask psychologists about their therapeutic orientation and experience to get a sense of fit. Similar to Psychiatrists, Psychologists aim at reducing the impact of mental health issues, however do so without the use of medication. That being said, a Psychologist may refer a client to a Psychiatrist if there is a need for secondary consultation, or symptom management through medication would assist in improving therapeutic outcomes.
Counsellors also provide talk-based therapies however the level of training between counsellors is extremely varied and un-regulated. At a minimum, counsellors are training to provide non-judgemental support. It is important to consider the reasons you are seeking therapy and do a bit of research around what services are in your area to access. Speaking to your GP is a great place to start.
Is this therapist my person?
The choice to enter into therapy will never be an easy decision to make; even for those who have gone through the process before. Meeting your therapist for the first time can be an even bigger deal. Without realising, the choice to enter therapy with this person was actually a commitment to form a connection with an unknown being.
Not dissimilar to any first meeting, this leap of faith is often plagued with conflicting emotions and can precipitate various hypotheses about the therapist, their therapy style, and whether one will actually be required to lie on the couch like all those therapy cartoons illustrate. From this, the engines of the world wide web are ignited and the online surveillance begins, which is all driven by the intention to increase knowledge by decreasing unknown factors; but more importantly, search for the information that will confirm that they will get it.
Some psychologists may have webpages (like this one) that provide an idea of their approach, issues they are comfortable working with, other professional interests, and some may even have their photo posted; all of which can help put the mind of an anxious client-to-be at ease. However some therapists may not provide that insight pre-first appointment. Regardless, whether or not this information is available does not necessarily determine the connection in the room, and connection is what allows the therapeutic magic to happen.
The first appointment can be experienced with anxiety and apprehension, but also relief and positive anticipation. Either way, whatever is experienced in the lead up to meeting your therapist, it is all valid. Keep in mind, that similar to other relationships (platonic, familial, intimate, or professional), the connection between the therapist and client may take time to develop, so give it a chance. However if the connection does not develop, despite attempts within therapy to understand why, an openness to trying again with someone new may be the best option for you. Remember, not all relationships work out; we are all human after all!